The Fight for Ossus

Jared: I’m going to shoot his throne.
Kris: Go get him Phun!
Sam: His back massager is totally not working.
Rich [GM]: You really pissed him off now.
Jared: I’m trying to make him as uncomfortable as possible.

Sam: If you’re going to go out, go out big.

Rich [GM]: Here’s the problem. The force sever’s not working yet.
Andy: DUH.

Kaileen: Obey Me!
Yuuzhan Vong Dragon: Yay food!

Andy: Maybe it’ll be like Ghostbusters. It’ll be positively charged poop and everything will be okay.

Mal: Blow up anything that moves on the surface until we get out.
Kaileen: Why did I marry you?
Mal: The sex was good.
Kaileen: Well…yeah.

Mirian: I’m sure you did Oona proud.
Kaileen and Phun: Who the hell is on our comms?
Mirian: Mirian.
Kaileen and Phun: Who the hell is Mirian??

Hunting for Lady Sage

Pandara: What about a pinata ship that when you blow it up thousands of widowmakers come out?
Nos: Like a hive ship.
Pandara: That’s a better name. Let’s call it that.

Sam: I’m so proud of my ex-character.

Rich [GM]: Borol is there…missing an arm.
Pandara: That’s a good look for you.

Oona Died, But Jared Had the Bad Night

Rich: There’s a little holo that says, “Alert! The Mistress is down!”
Andy: Do you think we’ll finally get a vacation?
Nikki: If I die I’m kicking your ass. With my new character.

Tom: It’s not like I was going to rob a Hutt.
Jared: Again.
Tom: That was never proven! There was only coincidental evidence! And proof!

Phun: I’ve never felt more useless.

Tom: I pull in next to Phun.
Pandara: Why’d you take the slow one?

Tom: We should get a really good droid and call it Oona.

Jared: What a great day to be on comms.

Andy [Looking at picture of Oona]: This is inaccurate. She doesn’t have a head anymore.
Rich: That was cold.
Kris: We could turn off the air conditioner now.

Rich: Kai.
Kris: I run to join the other Knights in defending Fel.
Rich: What? You’re going to honor your Oath instead of helping Pandara? You suck-up.
Meta-Kai: Meh, it’s Pandara, I don’t like her anyway.

Jared: Puts the fun in funeral.

Mobile Attack Black Holes

Pandara: I know a safe route in that may be dangerous.

Mal: If we survive, we raid the base.

Pandara: Scan for life forms!
Rich [GM]: The ship goes BOOM!
Phun: Pandara, I don’t detect any life signs.

Kris [Meta-Kai]: Ooh, I have a meat shield. That isn’t my husband for once.
Andy [Meta-Mal]: Suddenly I feel left out.
Kris [Meta-Kai]: Awww, next time I’ll use you as a meat shield, dear.

Mal: How is our tech doing more damage than our Mandalorians?

Visions and Portents

Rich [GM]: Second star on the right and straight on til morning. But I don’t fucking want to go to neverland!

Kaileen: As long as you understand it’s proprietary.
Phun: Don’t worry; she’ll only sell it to the highest bidder.
Mal: I guess we’ll be seeing Sha’lan again.

Tom: Do I die?
Rich [GM]: Shake that magic 8-ball. The future is unclear.

The Death of Darth Krayt

[Mal is facing Krayt alone, while the remainder of the party faces Maladi and several other Sith.]
Kai [shouting]: Mal! I’m pregnant! You’d better kick his ass! Don’t you dare die on me!
Mal: Don’t you think that would have been good to know about three days ago?
Kai: I only just found out!
Rich [GM]: Mal, you have a +2 morale bonus.
Kris: That’s what I call inspiration.

Kris: Stop helping the GM kill us!

Tom: Force lightning from her belly.
Rich [GM]: I’m the new baby Palpatine!
Kris: Abortion!
Andy: There goes my morale bonus.

Kris: Look Mal! We sent you backup! Oona the pacifist!

Mal: Why do all the droids go bzzzzz?
Kai: Let it go. It’s Oona’s special time with the droids.
Mal: A droid for this, a droid for that, even a droid to clean up afterwards!
Tom: Imagine what she does to the ship.

Force Ghost Zenair: Have fun with the twins.

Into the Sith Academy

Sam: Did I say anything about scowling menacingly? I meant I’m cowering behind Pandara.

Sam: I’ve already taken it from everyone else; I have to take it from Mal, too?

Sam [after accidentally shooting himself in the foot]: For my move action I’m going to hop around on one foot going “ow ow ow ow ow!”

Kris: I missed with one, hit with the the other, and didn’t shoot myself in the foot. Go Kai!
Sam: Show-off!

Rich [GM]: Down the hall you hear, “Oh my god, they’ve already killed –”
Larry: Kenny.

Storming the Temple

Mandalorian: Good news! The city has sent 5 more walkers up behind us!
Kaileen: You have an odd definition of ‘good news’.
Mandalorian: What could be more glorious than dying in battle?
Kaileen: Dying in bed. With my husband. Fucking.
Andy: I want that in the quotes.

Sha’lann [played by Tom for the evening]: You want the body gone?
Tom: Sha’lann has a disintegrator ray.
Rich [GM]: No more body.
Larry: Should have used that against the gate.

Jared: Most of us got our reputations by accident.

Jared: We just stumble from accident to accident.